Apr 20, 2012

Two Weeks Later.

On departing the land of Sooooo....



Have you ever done something in your life that was the right thing to do but the timing was both right and wrong?  My head's so all over the place right now, it's highly likely that I'm the only one out of all of us who's ever been in this predicament.  I have good news to share but common sense would dictate that it's far too early to be sharing it.   It is news that has changed my life and also, it seems, changed me.  All in the space of a few hours on a sunny Friday afternoon in April 2012.  

I am officially four weeks pregnant.  I know this for sure from today's blood test result.  I sort of knew before this from my collection of 5 dated home pregnancy tests.  Each with that second line getting darker with each passing day.  I have photos of my collection on my iPhone.  I know that this all sounds very weird and slightly gross but I am not alone.  I've not long left the land of Sooooo and we do strange things there to help us through the 2WW (or two week wait for the layperson).

Even wackier than confessing to owning $50 worth of First Response tests is the fact that I'm a different person tonight than the person who went to work at the crack of dawn with the weight of work and end of the 2WW on my shoulders.

The 'realist' me knew from bitter experience that four weeks was way too early to be telling people.  That things could would only change for the worse and that one day I'd be booking in to meet my obstetrician and the next I'd be meeting him for emergency surgery.  I also knew that my pregnant life would be the time I endured lived between blood tests and ultrasounds I anxiously hoped would miraculously avert an inevitable outcome I had no control over and was not responsible for.

The 'realist' me gave way to the 'new' me at around 12.37pm today when I got the phone call from my nurse at the clinic.  I was four weeks pregnant as of today and all I needed to do from now on was book a seven week ultrasound and be on my merry way until then.  No cautious suggestion of a repeat blood test in two day's time just to make sure.  Just an option to have a blood test in a week if I needed one for peace of mind.

Peace of mind.  That's what I found when I put down the phone.  I was completely calm and my mind clear.  I wouldn't be needing that blood test, thank you very much.  Because I had an overwhelming sense that all would be well.  I will be all right no matter what.  I am bold enough to tell the people that need to know that I am four weeks pregnant.  What I didn't expect was the genuine happiness my news gave those people.

I'm not sure how I will feel about this post tomorrow or on May 9 when I have that viability scan but this was the right thing for me to write for this moment.  I'm pregnant and we have lives to live.  Lives that aren't going to be put on hold between test results.  But rather lives that make the most of every moment.  Lives where fear and anxiety will take a back seat (I'd be kidding myself if I reckoned they could be totally banished from my life) to allow love, hope and faith to lead us forward.





67 comments:

  1. That is absolutely the best news. I am very happy for you. Be a realist later, for now enjoy this wonderful news! xx

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  2. I am a hardened lurker on many blogs, I just find it to personal to comment on many, as if I am somehow intruding, but after following your trials and tribulations for a long while now, I have to say I'm so happy and congratulations to you on your pregnancy and your newly found peace of mind!

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  3. I am one of those you have given happiness too, I was excited today to read it on twitter but this post made me squeal and jump up and down and share you story with my boyfriend. I'm so happy for you I really can't explain, but I'm sure it's not as extreme as what you're feeling. I hope you have smooth sailing from here for the next 36 weeks and think you will make an incredible mother. Congratulations and I look forward to maternity fashion posts ;-)
    Love ash xox

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  4. For a first cycle of IVF we both know that is the desired outcome!

    I am sending you every good wish in the world.  Here's crossing everything that this is the time things work out. (And there is no reason they shouldn't.)

    Love and best wishes to you and Mr SSG.

    T
    xxxxx

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  5. Horray for SSG and Mr SSG! Wishing you all the best and smooth sailing from now on. Much love, Susan x

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  6. So excited for you when I saw your tweet this morning ...sending you all my good wishes!  Denise

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  7. So happy for you.
    All the best - sending you love and positive thoughts xx

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  8. And congratulations. You deserve so much happiness x

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  9. Dear SSG, I'm so happy for you and I'm sending all my prayers your way!

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  10. I am so happy for you! I hope you cherish seeing your little bundle on your 7 week scan! :)

    AwayFromTheBlue.blogspot.com.au

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  11. I am very, very happy for you and your man (and a teensy little bit teary)! Congratulations and vibes for your successful pregnancy !

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  12. Soooooo . . . congratulations!  What wonderful, wonderful news!  I saw your tweets last night and was instantly so happy for you - how exciting!

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  13. I'm a lurker for a LOOONG time on here , never comented ( blush blush ) and even tho I don't know you ( just from
    Here ) while reading this post I had tears of joy for you and your dh :) congratulations !! Wonderful news :)

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  14. Yay!!!! it is the good news - Congrats again!!! =D

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  15. This news makes me very happy for you and Mr SSG. xox

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  16. girlonthepinkbikeApril 21, 2012 at 2:28 AM

    I'm so happy for both you and your hubby!! xoxo

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  17. This is such wonderful news!!! xxx

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  18. I couldnt be happier for you right now. I got all teary reading this, but it was happy teary, I promise. I love your attitude, not just to this but life in general. Congratulations on such an exciting time

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  19. OMG Congrats! Well done - totally delurking here to tell you I'm so pleased for you and Mr SSG. Very happy for you :D

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  20. I've never been this excited for a complete stranger before! Take this moment of joy, hope & love and enjoy it. May it lead to many more moments of joy, hope & love as you and Mr SSG continue your parenting journey. Congratulations!

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  21. Yay!  Congratulations to you and Mr SSG.  Wonderful wonderful news.  I'm so very excited for you :)

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  22. Do you know why you were pushed, probed and prodded to write this post, I don't know for sure you were, but I think you were. Because I had just started to believe that maybe, 2012 wasn't filled with magic like I had hoped so desperately it would be. And then, this. A moment of pure magic, written beautifully with so much love and loss and beauty intertwined. So thank you. Faith has been restored. Hope has been restored. And I'm bawling in a coffee shop that is packed to the eyeballs with people this Saturday morning and I don't even care. Calm confidence has been restored here too. 4 down, 36 to go. :) 

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  23. Wonderful wonderful news SSG, I'm really happy for you! You're sounding a lot like a zen Earth Mother already.

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  24. Yay for baby dust in the land of Soooooo. As Melissa said it gives us hope that 2012 will be a good year for so many riding the wave of Sooooooo (and spending lots of money of plastic sticks).

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  25. Congratulations! So thrilled for you.

    I hope the next few weeks pass by in the blink of an eye and you are seeing your little one on the screen before you know it xxx

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  26. Ohhh... I'm completely choked up and my heart is bursting out of my chest! I'm SO happy for you. I hate the 2WW and I'm very glad yours is over and with the best outcome. Love and our best wishes to all three of you. xx

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  27. Wonderful news SSG. I have been readiing your blog for a while now but have never posted on any blog. Until now. I have been following your Soooo journey, hoping for a happy outcome. I am truly delighted for you & Mr SSG. Happy days!

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  28. Wonderful wonderful news SSG! I admit to reading through a few months ago your entire post history- an enjoyable procrastination exercise coinciding with working through a work assignment!- and I haver followed your posting on pregnancy, life, the upheavals and downsides- so I m very happy for you! Best of luck my dear! xo

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  29. Hi Kasia
    Thanks for your kind note and so glad the blog helped you endure that assignment!SSG xxx

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  30. Hi Polly

    Thank you for kind wishes and for reading my blog.

    SSG xxx

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  31. Suz

    I'm sorry I never got around to writing back to you earlier.  I'm so touched.

    SSG xxx

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  32. Calendarbrain

    2012 is the year of good things!  And plastic sticks...

    Best of luck for your own journey.

    SSG xxx

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  33. Miss Piggy

    High praise indeed.  I may even feature brown rice and tofu recipes on the blog very soon...

    SSG xxx

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  34. Melissa

    Darling.  2012 will be fabulous for you too.  You are calm and confident already because it is true.  It is your time.

    SSG xxx

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  35. HI Angela

    Thank you!!!!

    SSG xxx

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  36. Essemgee

    This was such a lovely message.  I'm humbled.

    Thank you.

    SSG xxx

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  37. Hello Elle!

    Thanks for delurking!

    Best wishes

    SSG xxx

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  38. Thank you Fifi!!!

    SSG xxx

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  39. Thank you, girlonthepinkbike.

    Hope life is treating you well.

    SSG xxx

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  40. L,

    Thank you!  After all this time... it's happened.

    SSG xxx

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  41. Thanks Jen!!

    SSG xxx

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  42. Femme Curieuse, thank you!!!!  The joys of twitter.

    SSG xxx

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  43. Hi Erilii

    Oh, I'm sorry I made you cry.  Thanks for your kind thoughts.

    SSG xxx

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  44. Thank you, Mica!

    SSG xxx

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  45. Thank you, Nanne!

    SSG xxx

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  46. T,
    It's a miracle is all.
    Thanks for all your support over these months.

    SSG xxx

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  47. MissD!

    That's so cute about your boyfriend   Maternity fashion... that's a challenge...

    SSG xxx

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  48. Dear Anon

    Thank you for your support and taking the time to comment!  It means a great deal to me.

    SSG xxx

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  49. That is sound advice, (C)CG!

    Thank you

    SSG xxx

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  50. Congratulations lovely lady. I hope the next 36 bring with them a sense of peace, relief, excitement and most of all health, for a gorgeous wriggly crying hungry babe to fill your arms as a result.

    New beginnings for some, endings for others - life comes full circle.

    ~x~

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  51. So happy. So so happy. Beautiful news xx

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  52. I am beyond pleased for you and Mr. SSG! I'm a silent long-time reader of your blog and it never fails to make me laugh, smile and tear up(your first Soooooo.... post especially). My fingers and toes are crossed that the next few months are heart-break free and that the viability scan gives you the best news possible. Lets hope the peace of mind continues!
    xx

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  53. Fantastic news SSG! So happy for both of you. Will continue to keep you and little 'pea' in our prayers. Take care. 

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  54. I am so pleased to read about your news. Congratulations. Best wishes to you and Mr SSG. 

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  55. Congratulations, lovely. Boy, I am thrilled for you. Easier said than done to not worry about the future, but either way, enjoy this moment & try not to think on anything too much. But yeah, maybe no cheeky wines with lunch though :P Love.
    Heidi xo

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  56. Congratulations mr & mrs ssg! What wonderful news!

    Sure, it's early & something could still go wrong. But it also could all be perfect sailing all the way through to 40 weeks. So why not let yourself share this most wonderful time in your lives with people who are so excited for you! xx

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  57. The Passionate ShopperApril 21, 2012 at 6:56 PM

    I was working night shift last night & thinking about how you were going - I obviously missed this post yesterday - crossing my fingers that things continue to develop well!

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  58. Congratulations once again my dear :) I also love that your scan is the week before Mother's Day. I think it's a great sign. Much love xx

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  59. MARGARET SHANAHANApril 22, 2012 at 8:01 AM

    Very happy for you and Mr SSG

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  60. Sorry for the late post - catching up this morning!

    You know my thoughts on this matter - words can't describe how thrilled I am for you and the Mr. This is such exciting news.

    K xx

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  61. Hi SSG, so happy for you and Mr SSG. A dragon baby! Enjoy the journey of the next few month.

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  62. SSG, this news is the BEST. THE BEST. Congratulations. You WILL be ok. And that little person wants to be in this world. I just know it. C xo

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  63. That is truly wonderful news SSG, congrats.  I'm sending all my positive thoughts to your growing baby.

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  64. Bloody BRILLIANT news!!!!  So so so very happy for you and I wish you all the very best for a safe, happy, healthy and boring pregnancy :)

    Take care,
    BuBbles
    x.

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  65. Fantastic news SSG!  If the support of your blog readers is anything to go by, then this will be a very normal and ordinary pregnancy.  We are all wishing you well.

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  66. It has taken me an eternity to write an official CONGRATS but I have been thinking of you and Mr SSG constantly since I read the news! I even announced your news to my whole family on the weekend and no one needed any explanation, they all knew your whole journey and were beyond delighted to hear the confirmation. Wishing you great joy and happiness, with all our love from the Phoenix Family!

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  67. I'm really happy for and your family. 

    (I'm happy that your hopes and dreams finally happening and that instead of being frustrations and holding you back from enjoying life, they're something you can now rejoice in.)

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